Thursday, May 7, 2009

Is there anybody out there?

I know I've been gone a while...hope I haven't lost all five of my faithful readers. I was sick for almost an entire month, progressively getting worse until it developed into pneumonia. I will never put off going to the doctor again. That sucked balls.

I'm currently wrapping up Level II of nursing school. Half-way there baby! It seems like I was just accepted into the program last month. I took the mid-curricular HESI exam and aced it. It is a good indicator of how you will do on the nursing boards so I'm pretty stoked to find out I'm not a retard.

Level II nursing has been interesting. I've gotten to move to other units for clinicals. Thank God too because if I had to spend another day in the telemetry unit I was probably going to off myself with a bedpan. I helped with a c-section a couple of weeks ago and got puked on. It was still better than telemetry. I got to put in my first foley catheter on a real, live human! Yeah, I rocked it. Don't be jealous. (She may or may not have had an epidural at the time.) I got to witness my first vaginal birth (other than my own) up close and personal. It was gross and messy and beautiful all at the same time. I actually held her leg and coached her while she pushed that wiggly little blob out. Amazing and a little bittersweet for me.

What else has happened....we are gearing up for our guadalupe river trip in a couple of weeks. Four whole days of no kids, sun, floating the river, bbq, classic rock, beer....need I say more? I am so excited! This will be the first vacation big daddy and I have been on without the in-laws in about 57 years. Not that I don't love my in-laws, but lets be's called a vacation for a reason. Big daddy is lucky I'm letting him go.

I found out monday that my sister in law is having TWIN BOYS!!! I'm over the moon excited and getting every little detail planned for her shower. I can't wait until they are born. Maybe that will hold off the baby crazies for a while since my plumbing is out of commission.

Three things my son has said to me this week:

"Spiders just make me....shudder" - He has the vocabulary of a 12 year old. I'm pretty sure he was switched at the hospital. My real kid probably can't even speak three word sentences yet.

"I really value your friendship mom" - (he's three people, the only thing normal three year olds value are cheesy poofs and dry underwear)

"My penis has legs" - (no, those are your balls)

See you guys tomorrow with the story of how I was banned for life from a casino.


Candice said...

Well, me and your kid have something in common because my penis totally has legs too!

Samsmama said...

Man, you've done some pretty awesome stuff in school! I couldn't do any of it. The moment somebody puked on me I'd have returend the favor.

"I really value your friendship". Funniest thing I've read today.

Mary said...

wow- I value your friendship as well :)
And I'm so jealous of your nursing experience. I'm still waiting, fingers crossed, to see if they even accept people my age to the nursing school!
Wait, if I get accepted that means that medically they'll take care of ME, right? No?
I should have checked this out more thoroughly...

Cookie Crums said...

I might just have your kid then....b/c my little boy is pushing 2 and doesn't say the first word! :) So jealous of the vacation with JUST you and hubby..... I need one of those!

Anonymous said...

I was cracking up about the "my penis has legs."

Just the other day I walked in on my fiance and his 4 year old son talking and heard "they're big and that what holds my t-t on?"


~*~DawnSC~*~ said...

Congrats on your nursing school achievements!

Glad you're back to blogging. Missed you!

Erin Jeannine said...

Um, where is Guadalupe River and what time should I be there?

Congrats on your test!!!

My girlfriend has a three-year-old who is smarter than I am and I think she and BB might be soulmates. She held my hand once between both of hers while I was reading her a story and told me, "I really enjoy when you read stories to me; you do it so well."

I have a kicked-out-of-a-casino-for-life story too!

LivingDeadNurse said...

oh crap lol i love what your kid said about his weewee

Maggie said...

I WANNA GO TUBIN' TOO!!!!!!! I LOVE the Guadalupe!!!!! but I guess if you took me along that wouldn't be the "just for us" vacation then huh?