Monday, June 16, 2008

Joe's Crab Shack and Domestic Violence

About six of us decided to go to a low key dinner Friday evening after work. We even brought the kids. We picked Joe's Crab Shack because they have a pretty good (read: less germ infested) playground for the kiddos to play on. The kids had a blast, we had a few buckets of beer, and dinner was great.

We head to BFF's house to hang out for the evening. Low key, remember? We pull in the driveway and hear screaming. I chalk it up to the wild banchee children that live across the street. (WTF is up with all the screaming kids do nowadays anyhow??) So, we usher the kids into the house and I'm one of the last ones to walk in. Suddenly a car alarm goes off. Still, perfectly normal for a houston suburb.

Then we hear a woman screaming, and the children screaming at us..."He's hitting her, he's hitting her!" I turn around. Sure enough the husband is on top of the wife in their car, beating the shit out of her. She had set off the panic button in the car to get our attention. Their two little boys were on the porch watching. It was awful.

I scream to the guys to go help. I scream at the girls to call 911. BFF, completely oblivious to what is happening, calls 911 while mouthing to me with utter confusion "why am I calling 911?"
Another friend is inside with the kids, BFF is on the phone with the 911 operator (still trying to figure out what the hell is going on), and the guys have wrestled this guy off of his wife and are trying to talk him down. Wife beater then runs in his house to get his pit to "attack us". HA! The pit was a puppy and could give a shit less what was going on, he ran straight at us wagging his tail, begging for someone to pet him. Nice guard dog, jackass.

Then we were all called "white n---ers". I had to laugh at the irony of what was happening. Cracked out shirtless wife beater + pit bull + pistol....rightttt.... In retrospect we are all pretty lucky we didn't get our asses shot.

We did learn that the police have a three minute response time. Not too shabby. They wasted no time in slamming his ass down on the hood of the car. Cuff and stuff baby.

So, to sum it up, dinner, domestic violence, and witness testimony. Low key Friday my ass. I think it's now a proven fact that we are magnets for drama.

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