Tuesday, October 7, 2008

You just cannot make this shit up


I guess I should start off by reminding you all that BFF and I work in Greenspoint. Fondly known as Gunspoint to the rest of Houston, because it is ghetto faaabulous. Seriously, BD has forbidden me from going anywhere over here by myself because he's afraid I'll get kidnapped/gang raped/car jacked/beaten for being a cracka. I'm more than happy to oblige his request.

Sooo yesterday BFF and I were outside 'getting some fresh air' as we usually do after lunch. We are in deep conversation about important shit like politics. Okay, not really, we were talking about our hair and the effects of low lights versus high lights. Anyhow, mid sentence BFF stops and says "oh.ma.gah". I know, after hearing that, when I turn my head to the left I'm going to witness some sort of ghetto debauchery that only happens in Greenspoint. And I was right.

There was a woman on a bike with a baby. When I say "woman", I mean she was like 16, and when I say "on a bike" I mean someone elses bike that she just jacked, and when I say "with a baby" I mean she had the baby propped up on the nut bar just dangling there. The baby couldn't have been more than 12 months old. Seriously. He was sitting on the nut bar (I don't know the proper name for it okay?) with his little feet dangling dangerously close to the tire spokes. It made me really sad after I stopped laughing.

Then it got a little weirder. She stopped, picked her kid up by the elbow (as most fantastic mothers do) and put him on the sidewalk. She was obviously pissed at his lack of motor skills and ability to hang on to the nutbar. She threw his shoes on the ground. The poor little guy hurried to put his shoes on. He also didn't have pants on, in case you were wondering. She threw the bike down right there in the middle of the sidewalk and left it there. That is how I came to the not so shocking conclusion that she stole it. She grabbed the little boy and just walked off. Possibly one of the weirdest things I've ever seen in Gunspoint.

BFF and I just sat there with our mouths hanging open for a good two minutes. I looked at her and said "did that shit just really happen?"

Good times.

1 comment:

Crystal said...

i work in greenspoint too!

you know you are in the ghetto when they stick the police station right inside the mall.