Is there anybody out there?

I know I've been gone a while...hope I haven't lost all five of my faithful readers. I was sick for almost an entire month, progressively getting worse until it developed into pneumonia. I will never put off going to the doctor again. That sucked balls.

I'm currently wrapping up Level II of nursing school. Half-way there baby! It seems like I was just accepted into the program last month. I took the mid-curricular HESI exam and aced it. It is a good indicator of how you will do on the nursing boards so I'm pretty stoked to find out I'm not a retard.

Level II nursing has been interesting. I've gotten to move to other units for clinicals. Thank God too because if I had to spend another day in the telemetry unit I was probably going to off myself with a bedpan. I helped with a c-section a couple of weeks ago and got puked on. It was still better than telemetry. I got to put in my first foley catheter on a real, live human! Yeah, I rocked it. Don't be jealous. (She may or may not have had an epidural at the time.) I got to witness my first vaginal birth (other than my own) up close and personal. It was gross and messy and beautiful all at the same time. I actually held her leg and coached her while she pushed that wiggly little blob out. Amazing and a little bittersweet for me.

What else has happened....we are gearing up for our guadalupe river trip in a couple of weeks. Four whole days of no kids, sun, floating the river, bbq, classic rock, beer....need I say more? I am so excited! This will be the first vacation big daddy and I have been on without the in-laws in about 57 years. Not that I don't love my in-laws, but lets be honest...it's called a vacation for a reason. Big daddy is lucky I'm letting him go.

I found out monday that my sister in law is having TWIN BOYS!!! I'm over the moon excited and getting every little detail planned for her shower. I can't wait until they are born. Maybe that will hold off the baby crazies for a while since my plumbing is out of commission.

Three things my son has said to me this week:

"Spiders just make me....shudder" - He has the vocabulary of a 12 year old. I'm pretty sure he was switched at the hospital. My real kid probably can't even speak three word sentences yet.

"I really value your friendship mom" - (he's three people, the only thing normal three year olds value are cheesy poofs and dry underwear)

"My penis has legs" - (no, those are your balls)

See you guys tomorrow with the story of how I was banned for life from a casino.